🏆 #1 Product of the Day Product Hunt

Slap your MacBook.
It screams back.

That's it. That's the app.

Download for Mac See how it works
macOS 14.6+ (Sonoma) M1PRO+ MacBook required
In the wild

SlapDash went viral.
Like, everywhere.

Featured on 500+ US radio stations. Viral on Instagram, TikTok, and X. Millions of impressions. Thousands of slappers.

Menu bar resident

Your laptop has feelings now

SlapDash hides in your menu bar. Slap your MacBook and it screams back, with volume proportional to your force. No dock icon. No window. Just consequences.

Finder
FileEditViewGoWindowHelp
that's me ↓
SlapDash 100% 9:41 AM

→ no dock icon. just a tiny hand judging your typing.

Feature dump

Also, it does these things

Menu bar only

No dock icon. No window. Lurks silently like a small angry pet.

Volume scales with force

Gentle tap? Whisper. Full slap? Full volume. Physics, but stupid.

Adjustable sensitivity

From "earthquake detector" to "needs a running start". You decide.

Cooldown timer

Prevents meltdowns during rapid slap sessions. Sound dignity preserved.

USB Moaner

Coming Soon

Plug or unplug a USB device. It moans. You're welcome.

Launch at login

Always ready. Always listening. Sleep with one eye open, Mac.

Slap counter

Tracks your lifetime slaps. Global high score pending. Be ready.

Onboarding

A polite welcome flow before the chaos begins. We're not monsters.

Tuning panel

Dial in your slap

Two sliders. Two decisions. Set a vibe somewhere between "concerned librarian" and "ring announcer". This preview is decorative — the real ones live in the menu bar.

Sensitivity 0.064g
Butterfly landingFull commitment
Cooldown 1.0s
Rapid-fire hecklingDramatic pauses
Voice packs

Nine moods of protest

150+ sound clips across 9 voice packs. Your open-plan office will have questions.

🙋‍♀️WomanTheatrical. Affronted. Will sigh.
🧔ManA guy who didn't deserve this.
🐐GoatDisrespectful. Resonant. Iconic.
🐱CatYowls of betrayal, on demand.
🐶DogYelps with surprising range.
🤖RobotGlitchy distress. Buy more RAM.
👶BabyUse sparingly. Or maliciously.
👻GhostWails from the laptop afterlife.
⛩️Anime"NANI?!" with appropriate volume.
What's coming

Roadmap 🗺️

Working on it. Probably. Definitely.

✓
Custom Sound Packs v1.5 · coming soon

Record your own voice, your cat, your boss — whatever you want your MacBook to scream when assaulted.

🔒
Anti-Theft Mode coming later

Motion-triggered alarm with Selfie of Shame, auto-arm on screen lock, Touch ID to disarm. (Coming Soon.)

📱
iOS Version ios app

Same energy, pocket-sized. Slap your iPhone and it fights back. The cycle continues.

Nerdy tech details

Wildly overengineered slap detection

Five concurrent accelerometer algorithms vote on whether what just happened was, in fact, a slap. Because one algorithm is for cowards.

High-Pass Filter A1

Strips out gravity so we only see the impacts — not your hand resting on the trackpad.

STA/LTA Ratio A2

Compares short-term vs long-term averages at three timescales. Borrowed from seismology, used for vengeance.

CUSUM A3

Detects sudden shifts in acceleration. Good at catching slaps that ramp in from a sneaky angle.

Kurtosis A4

4th statistical moment — finds sharp spikes against a calm baseline. Math, doing math things.

Peak / MAD A5

Median Absolute Deviation outlier detection. The bouncer at the door of the slap algorithm club.

Quorum vote

When enough of the five algorithms agree → sound plays. Otherwise, you were just being weird.

When enough algorithms agree → sound plays
SlapDash · architecture.swift 
// SlapDash — runtime composition
App {
  MenuBarScene {
    SlapMenu(state: $state)
      .onAppear { Detector.start() }
  }

  Detector {
    CMMotionManager @ 200Hz
      ├─ HighPass()         // strip gravity
      ├─ STALTA(windows: [5, 20, 80])
      ├─ CUSUM(k: 0.05, h: 8)
      ├─ Kurtosis(window: 32)
      └─ PeakMAD(z: 5.5)

    Quorum(agree: 3 of 5, within: 40ms)
      → Player.play(pack: state.pack,
                       gain: map(force, 0...1))
      → Cooldown(state.cooldown)
  }
}
100% Free · No credit card · No catch

Free. Yes, actually free.

Requires an M1PRO+ MacBook running macOS 14.6 Sonoma or later. No credit card. No catch. Just consequences.

Download for Mac
Frequently asked

Questions, answered

Wait, is SlapDash a security app?
No. It's a therapy app. For your laptop.
Will I void my MacBook warranty?
Probably not. We're not lawyers, though, so apply judgment proportional to the value of the object you are about to strike.
Does it work on Intel Macs?
No. M1 Pro or better only. The accelerometer plumbing we need just isn't there.
Can I add my own sounds?
Yes! Coming in v1.5. Record anything: your voice, your dog, your manager during standup.
Does it drain my battery?
Barely. Less than your existential dread, less than one Chrome tab.
Will it trigger during normal typing?
No. It only fires on sharp impacts. That's what the five algorithms are for — they agree on what counts as a real slap.
It's free. Do I still get a refund?
You downloaded a free app and you want your money back? Bold. We respect it. There's nothing to refund. Go slap your laptop.
Wait… it's actually free?
Yes. Free. No subscription. No "premium tier". No catching feelings. Just download it, slap your Mac, and go live your life.
Is there a Windows version?
No. Windows users deserve their own suffering.